


Just in a Dream

by Fun2beme1



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Mild Sexual Content, some language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:55:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 3,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25350469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fun2beme1/pseuds/Fun2beme1
Summary: Being awake is hell. Closing our eyes, our only reprieve.
Relationships: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader
Kudos: 21





	1. Salvation

The titan keeps chasing him. He's running, but his pursuer is there at every turn. He races around the corner and that's when everything changes. Up ahead is like nothing he's ever seen before. Loud, metal carriages race to and fro past his vision. Strangely dressed people walk by, seemingly unperturbed by the noise. 'safety!' he thinks, as he spots you and with the titan bearing down on him he gives no more thought to the strangeness he sees before him. You're up ahead. Salvation. He dashes forward into the strange world, and looks back once, only to turn away in pain. The titan sits at the threshold, apparently unable to follow. It's leering at him and munching Farlan's corpse.  
He takes a tentative step. 'This place stinks to high hell!' he thinks, a look of distaste on his face. Realizing he's losing you in the crowd he continues on. The metal carriages belch forth noxious fumes all around him, but he still manages to find you. There. Just turning the corner. You're not hard for him to pinpoint. Your f/c dress, your h/l h/c hair bounces in time with every step. Sunlight glints off a small buckle on your heels as you continue on. A heart on a chain hugs your neck.  
Eventually, he comes into a more quiet place. Small cozy looking houses and tree lined streets replace the noise and chaos he just experienced. You head up the walk to a small house with a rather humble garden along the front. Flowering bushes with thick, drooping blooms adorn the yard beneath the windows.  
Instead of following you inside however, he opts for looking into the window, cupping his hands against the glare.  
You're doing dishes and lightly humming to yourself, and the scene would be absolute perfection if not for the man standing behind you. He has his arms around you, and he's kissing your neck, that much is apparent from his viewpoint. What unsettles him however, is the odd familiarity this figure has. He bangs on the window. The woman pays it no mind, but the man turns and their eyes lock in surprised recognition. It's him. He's staring at himself. After a moment of silently assessing each other, his doppelganger turns away and goes back to his affections. This isn't fair! He angrily beats on the glass again. Again his doppelganger turns, shakes his head and points angrily at him. 'GO AWAY!', the gesture seems to imply, but instead he continues to beat on the glass. Finally, it seems his doppelganger has had enough of the distraction and rolling his eyes, fades from view. Now he can gaze at the woman in the f/c dress. He can....  
He can hear the roar of the titan.


	2. Awakening I

With a strangled gasp, Levi's arms splay out stiffly; knocking everything from his desk in the process. With a groan, he rests his head back down on the cool mohagony before standing up and collecting the papers which he had scattered.  
It's going to be a long day. Having only got two hours of sleep, of course doesn't help. He's used to it though. The endless march of days, seemingly like a nightmare on their own. One dragging into the other. Training, meetings, paperwork. Repeat until insane. An endless stream of black tea to stave off the inevitable nightmares. His friends, his soldiers, his mom.....  
He sighs and goes back to the endless reams of paperwork; the mundane salvation against sleep. 

He....


	3. Forever Searching

Maybe he can find you. He's here again, in the quiet little neighborhood that he had found himself the night before. He thinks maybe he remembers where your house is, and sets off walking. He avoids the people here as best as possible, crossing to the other side of the street at times. He knows he's an outsider here. What would they do if they knew? Deep down he thinks they already do. It couldn't be more obvious, with the ODM gear strapped to his hips. And after what seems like a lifetime of searching, he starts to feel a worm of unease. Where is she? Looking around in panic, all he sees is an unending stream of houses. They all look the same. None of them look like yours. The longer he searches, the more accusing the stares and the more his anxiety grows. That innocent looking elderly lady is now leering at him over her roses. The kids playing jump rope are going abnormally fast, their chanting jump rope songs reaching a high pitch scream.  
Then everything shifts. It's titans where once were old ladies and children. A battlefield has replaced quiet streets. His heart freezes in his chest. There you are, trying to climb a tree and get away. He springs into action, slicing every nape that gets in his way. Surely he'll make it in time, he has to! He's fairly certain that if you die here, you'll be dead in that other world, too.  
And that's when his gear sputters.  
He's out of gas....


	4. Awakening II

He's up immediately, and with a growl of frustration he shoves everything off of his desk.  
"Fuck!" He shouts, turning and punching a hole in his wall.  
"Fuck!" The agitation grows worse as he thinks about what just happened.  
'I couldn't save her. Of course not! I can't save anybody! Fucking useless, Levi!'  
There's a knock on his door. Opening the door in fury, his eyes meet Erwin's.  
"Meeting before today's expedition. Fifteen minutes." Erwin says, and walks immediately away. He knows when Levi wakes up like this, it's best to give him space.   
He's calming down now. All it took was that simple reminder. Expedition today. He grins. He's going to kill them all.   
He breaks ranks the minute the first group is spotted, moving from nape to nape with frightening speed.  
"Isabel!" He slices.  
"Farlan!" He slashes.  
"Petra! Oruo!" An unstoppable dance of death. Every name fuels his anger, and finally the last titan is in sight. His rage intensifies. This is the one that took you away from him, he's sure of it. He's going to make it pay.  
"That was reckless Levi, even for you." Erwin is saying to him as they walk through the barracks.  
He chuckles coldly. He knows better than anyone exactly how reckless he was. He simply doesn't give a shit.  
"Lose anyone? Complete our objective? If the answer to the first is no, and the second is yes; which it is, then who cares." He storms off towards his quarters then, uncaring of what Erwin's response will be. He's tired.   
'what's it going to be tonight?' he thinks sarcastically. 'titans annihilate the entire regiment? that Eren kid turning on us? oh! how about I finally fucking die and am done with this shit once and for all!'  
His eyelids grow heavy, but he sits at his desk. As inviting as that bed in the other room looks, he just can't. He can't invite this shit in. All it does is give him heartache after heartache. He...


	5. A Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unapologetically short. Don't you wish Levi slept a little longer?

He's in the middle of the battlefield and he can barely move through the mud and blood that's soaking the ground. It sucks at his legs like quicksand. If he can just make it to the treeline....   
What's this? At the base of the tree... a necklace? It's a heart on a chain. You were wearing this, he's sure of it. 'If the necklace is here, but she's not... did she survive?' He looks, but doesn't see you anywhere. He realizes he's crying and clutching the necklace hard enough to hurt. He....


	6. Awakening III

He wakes up with a gasp. Giving himself a moment to collect himself, he wipes his eyes with the heel of his hand.  
The necklace is still in his grasp.  
He bursts out of his room, not caring about the racket he's making. "HANJI!!!" He strides down the hall quickly, ignoring the curious stares of the cadets peering out of their rooms in wonder. "HANJI!"  
Her door is open before he even reaches her.  
"Levi, for crying out loud get in here!" She shuts her door the minute he's inside. Wrapping her robe around her a little tighter, she looks at him curiously.  
"What's going on?"  
He slams the necklace onto her desk.  
"Is this real? Do you see it too?"  
"Of course it's real. It's a necklace, why wouldn't I see it?" She looks at him curiously.  
"I found it on the battlefield. In my DREAM."  
"Levi, you had to of found it earlier, then associated it into your dream. You're confused."  
"Oh? So I found it, carried it throughout the whole battle, walked into the barracks, took a shower, got dressed, went through my WHOLE nightmarish nightly routine and never once let go of it? Never noticed it until I woke up?"  
She gives him an incredulous look, eyes going to the necklace and back again.  
"Can I?" She asks, indicating the necklace. He nods impatiently.  
She picks it up and examines it closely. "There's a latch, Levi." She says and he leans closer to take a look as she pops it open. His eyes widen in excitement.  
"Her! That's her!" There's a small picture of you nestled in the left side of the locket. The right side is empty.  
"Looks like the right side is meant for another picture..." Hanji shakes her head and closes the locket, handing it back to him. "Tell me about these dreams, Levi."  
He spends the next 30 minutes talking, and as he does he actually feel a bit calmer. He can't get the nagging suspicion that all of this is real somehow out of his head, though.  
"This necklace is one hell of a coincidence, Levi. I admit it. Why don't you try keeping a journal? Maybe we can piece something together if you write it all down."  
With that he nods, and heads for the door. "Thanks Hanji."

He finds himself actually looking forward to going to sleep tonight. Hoping he'll find you in his dreams, he actually heads for his bed for a change. He finishes up his paperwork, and takes a quick shower. Having concluded this, he gets ready for bed.  
He lets out a sigh as he slips beneath the cool, crisp sheets. 'This feel so good', he thinks as his head hits the pillow. 'I need to do this more often'. He rolls over onto his side, and grabs the other pillow; hugging it to him. With an embarrassed start, he realizes he's imagining it's you. With a shrug and a smile, he hugs his 'pillow/YN closer and drifts off to sleep.  
He....


	7. Meeting

He's standing on a bridge. Designed for walking only no doubt, as it's rather narrow. Weeping willows adorn the shore to both sides of the river it traverses, and very conversational ducks swim lazily by. He sees you looking out over the water, leaning on your elbows with your hands clasped before you.  
He's trembling, he realizes and unsure what to do. Despite this, he's moving closer to you as if pulled by some invisible force.  
'Gravity', he thinks. 'She's my gravity'.  
"Hello."  
Your voice sends sparks up and down his spine, painful yet beautiful feeling.  
"Hi."  
"I've been waiting. What took you so long?"  
"I... I... there were titans." Unsure how to respond. You were waiting for him? This makes him impossibly happy, and he moves closer.  
You flap your hand dismissively. "You don't have to worry about that shit here."  
"I can't help it. The titans keep coming, whether I want them or not."  
You continue to look out over the water.  
"What's your name?"  
"I'm Y/N. What's yours?"  
"Levi."  
"Levi..." You say, drawing it out as if tasting it. The way you say his name causes ripples of pleasure to course down his spine. "I'm glad I got to talk to you finally. I've seen you many times but..." You shrug and shake your head.  
"I.. I have something of yours Y/N."  
You look at him questioningly.  
"It's your necklace. I found it by a tree. I thought you were lost to me."  
"Where is it?"  
"It's on my nightstand. I keep it with me everywhere." He blushes at this admission, gaze seeking the ground.  
"Good. I feel closer to you knowing it is in your possession."  
He looks up startled.  
"You mean that?"  
You nod. "Is it always going to be like this? Only having these moments when we close our eyes?" You lean toward him, and the panic in his eyes makes you kinda want to giggle. Is he afraid to kiss you?  
He is.   
He.....


	8. Awakening IV

Sits up in his bed with a gasp, followed by a frustrated groan as he falls back to his pillow, face in his hands.  
Dammit! She was just about to kiss me too! He gets up, scribbles everything into his journal quickly and then takes a shower. Is it his imagination? He can swear he smells perfume...  
It's gone now and with a shrug he dries off, then gets dressed. Erwin is wanting to meet about the upcoming expedition this morning and it wouldn't be good to miss this one. They might just have a plan for catching Reiner and Bertholdt. No he definitely doesn't want to miss this one.  
The day is finally over, and looking at the paperwork sitting in a heap on his desk he groans.  
I just want to sleep! Find her!  
He sits nonetheless, and slogs his way through at least half of his work before putting his pen aside. Running his hands through his hair, he heaves a tired sigh and heads for the bedroom. He....


	9. This Awful World

He finds himself on the same bridge, and his beautiful Y/N waits for him. Taking his hand you lead him away, and down a path through thick- leaved trees. Animals skitter through the undergrowth and the hushed chirping of birds greet his ears. The maniacal quacking of ducks has been left in the distance for some time now, and it feels peaceful here. It feels like a place he could stay forever. If, of course; you are there to accompany him. Without you, the world is a swirling mix of chaos, blood and death. A world of titans. Best not to think of these things, though. He has the irrational fear that invoking their name will bring them down upon them.  
"Don't think of such things," You whisper, and he looks to you in surprise. "It changes the energy here. Can you feel it?"  
He can. A subtle shift in vibration, like a tensely plucked string. It hums discordantly before reverting to it's subtle, peaceful tone.  
"I'm sorry. I fear these things follow me wherever I go."  
"You have no need of these fears here." You whisper, and then you do kiss him. This time instead of waking up, he remains blissfully asleep; lost in the taste of your mouth. The chirping birds seem to hit almost a crescendo, then go eerily silent; leaving only the sound of his beating heart.  
"Levi, what's wrong?" He can't hear you. Your lips move, but no sound reaches him. Thudding footsteps shake the undergrowth, and he looks at you in despair.  
"Titans. This awful world! Why can't you just stay with me?" You silently mouth as you fade from view. He....


	10. Awakening V

He awakens in tears, and also with the feeling that something is wrong. Bells clang in the distance, and he hears soldiers running past his door.  
"Titans! Titans have broken through the wall!" He flies up from his bed and dresses hurriedly, grabbing the locket on his way out the door.  
It was a long day, and a beaten Levi drags himself into his quarters much later. Sore, battered and bruised, he hisses as the cold water from the shower hits his wounds, and bathes quickly. As quickly as his injuries will allow anyway. He feels stretched and mutilated as he eases himself into bed. Worried about the losses that might plague his dreams tonight, he closes his eyes hoping to only see you.  
Please let it be Y/N, he thinks. Only Y/N. I want nothing else right now. This world can fucking hang itself. He.....


	11. Linger

He opens his eyes. You are in his bed with him, the covers thrown over the top of you both like a couple of teenagers.  
"You're hurt." You state with some concern.  
"It's nothing. I heal fast, and never mind that. How did you get here?"  
You shrug. "Does it matter Levi? Everything is nightmares without you. I'm happy to be right here."  
He pulls you into his arms with a hiss of pain.  
"Be careful, you'll reopen your injuries."   
"Worth it." He says, and kisses you. You kiss him back, and mindful of his injuries pull him closer.  
"I don't want to leave."  
He shakes his head, kissing you again. "Don't even think about it Y/N. Maybe we won't have to wake up from this one."  
"We have to wake up sometime, and it would probably be a good idea to do so now. Wake up, Levi."  
"I don't want to!"  
"Levi, wake up."  
He....


	12. Awakening VI

He sits up to the sound of knocking on his door. With a defeated sigh, he gets up and is about to answer the door when he stops cold. Perfume. Hers. He pauses, ignoring the persistent knocking on the door, and takes a deep breath. His eyes open wide with excitement! You're still here somewhere, you have to be! He searches his quarters frantically, despairing more and more the longer he searches. You're nowhere.  
"Y/N!"  
The knocking comes again, louder and more persistent.  
"Levi!"   
It's Hanji.  
He rips the door open, yanking her into his quarters.   
"Do you smell that? Hanji, do you smell it?" His fingers are digging painfully into her arms, his face a mask of frustration and pain.  
"Levi! You're hurting me, stop!"  
He lets go of her then, running his fingers through his hair anxiously he asks again.  
"Do you?"  
She gives him a cautious look and sniffs the air.  
"Perfume?"  
"Oh thank the fucking walls, I'm not going crazy." He breathes a sigh of relief and sits on his couch, strength gone. "It's hers, Hanji. I smelled it once before, but it was gone before I could really be sure. She was here, with me." He puts his face in his hands and starts to cry. Unaccustomed to this emotional reaction, he begins to choke, which only makes him cry harder. After a few moments, he takes a deep snuffling breath and looks up.  
'He looks absolutely haunted'. Hanji thinks, and comes to sit beside him.  
"I can't do this anymore Hanji. I can't have just these fleeting moments. What the fuck am I supposed to do? Help me, Hanji."  
"I honestly don't know how to help with this." She says, and he begins to cry again. "I came to get a look at your injuries. May I?"  
He shrugs and looks out the window, eyes filled with pain. She looks him over quickly, then cleans and redresses his wounds.  
"Go back to bed. Do as much sleeping as you can today. I'll tell Erwin I have you on bedrest. I feel this is the best I can do to help."  
"Thank you Hanji." His voice, barely above a whisper is cracked with pain.  
Giving him a sympathetic look she closes the door behind her.  
He makes his way back to his bed, praying for sleep but it doesn't come. Just this anxious gnawing feeling, a despair that has him all but convinced he'll never see her again. Frustrated, he gets up and focuses on some paperwork, hoping the monotony will wear him down. Eventually it does, and he drags himself off to bed, praying for sleep. He....


	13. A Moment With You

He's on top of you. Bodies moving rhythmically together, sheets dampened with sweat. It's intoxicating, this pleasure is like nothing he has ever experienced before and it's unending. Lost in your clinging limbs and the feeling of being inside you, he closes his eyes and lets out a long shaking moan.  
"I love you" You whisper.  
"I love you, too." And the feeling coalesces into something almost too huge for words, coiling and expanding red hot in his loins. His thrusts become frantic and desperate, he....  
No! Not already, I don't want to wake up yet! No! He.....


	14. Awake

He awakens with a start.  
"Fuck!" He yells into his empty room. Empty that is, expect for the warm body that is lying beside him.  
You.   
This can't be, he thinks. Can it?  
You open your eyes.  
"Levi?"  
Laughing and crying, he pulls you into his arms for a long passionate kiss.  
"Where were we?" He asks, a playful smile on his lips.  
You smile in return, wrapping your arms around him.  
The locket sits opened on the nightstand, complete now. A picture of you on the left, and him on the right.  
Forever.


End file.
